Title: Longing â“ Part 2
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Pairing: Morgan/Garcia
Prompt for 30 forbidden fruits: #25 Forbidden
Rating: T, most definitely
Disclaimer: Neither the show nor the characters belong to me, they belong to CBS. Nonetheless, I love to borrow them from time to time.
Summary: Part 8/? of the âLove and Prejudiceâ-series. Penelopeâs point of view again. What she thinks about the events of the afternoon, and her relationship with Derek â“ and with Kevin.
warnings: none
âKevin, would youâŚâ Penelope tried again, and sighed, annoyed. It was merely impossible to have a reasonable conversation with Kevin â“ especially when the topic was Derek Morgan.
âWhat? You expect me to stay calm when youâre away with him again?â Kevin shouted.
âKevin, please.â Penelopeâs voice became more stern. âIâm on a case with the team. It wasnât Derek who told me to go with them, and it wasnât my decision, either. If you want to complain, call Hotch!â
And then she made things worse once again. She hung up on him. She just couldnât stand his jealous outbursts any longer.
Only twenty seconds later, her phone was ringing again. Penelope growled. Did he really think that she wanted to talk to him and hear his ranting right now?! Wasnât the fact that sheâd just hung up on him a sign?!
Why had she acted like that, anyway? This wasnât the first time Kevin was jealous of Derek, but it was the first time theyâd really fought about it. In fact, this was their first real fight at all â“ and it didnât seem to be ending.
Whenever Kevin called her, she was annoyed, because she expected him to complain about the fact that she was âon the road with Derek Morganâ again. Whenever she was annoyed, Kevin thought heâd interrupted something â“ and immediately burst with jealousy again.
And the fact that her mind was busy processing Derekâs strange behavior wasnât helping a single bit. Why had he been acting so weird, lately? He kept staring at her, making her shiver every damn time she noticed it, and making the goddamn daydreams come back.
She was over this. She was over drooling over Derek Morgan every time he entered the room. She was over daydreaming about things that were never going to happen. She was over longing for him on lonely nights. Or at least, she thought she was.
The truth was, there only had to be the slightest hint that Derek might be interested in her to make her abandon all her resolutions immediately and go back to feeling like a lovestruck teenager, just like sheâd felt when she first met Derek.
She was crazy about him, and that wasnât going to change anytime soon, especially not with this heat. And it wasnât only the ridiculously high temperature that made her feel this way. Every time Derek Morgan entered the room, the temperature rose sky high.
Maybe heâd noticed it, too. Maybe it wasnât just her. Maybe he really felt the same; as if there was some kind of special connection between them.
Yeah, keep dreaming, Penelope!
Why did she have to be this obsessed with him? Why couldnât she just move on and accept that this was never gonna happen? Why did he always have to make her feel this way???
This afternoon, when he had pressed her against the wall and pretended to be about to ravish her, sheâd realized that no matter how hard she tried, she would always be at his feet; and she would never love Kevin, or anyone else for that matter, as much as she loved Derek.
He didnât only have her heart; he had her body and her soul just as much. He had power over her. She was nothing but his marionette, and there was nothing she could do about it. No matter how much she pretended to have moved on with Kevin, the moment Derek snapped his fingers, she fell for him again.
As a matter of fact, if heâd really tried and seduced her this afternoon, sheâd even cheated on her boyfriend without reconsidering it for a single second â“ something sheâd always been sure she would never do. Yes, she was his. He could do anything he wanted with her, anytime; kiss her, make love to her â“ or break her heart.
Penelope couldnât stop the tears from streaming down her face, nor the sob that escaped her mouth. Sheâd wanted to move on so badly. Sheâd wanted to finally find someone and be happy, and sheâd thought she had been. She loved Kevin, after all.
But she wasnât. Kevin just couldnât make her happy. No matter how sweet and caring he was, no matter how much he loved her and cared about her, he wasnât Derek â“ and she would never be able to love him the way she loved Derek.
Screw it! It didnât matter that she loved Derek more than she loved Kevin. She and Derek werenât going to happen. It was a dream, nothing more.
Oh, but what a dream it was! How good it had felt when he had been so close to her. His hot, strong body pressed against hers⌠The mere thought of that feeling made her shiver again. This wasnât normal. She wasnât acting normal; wasnât even thinking normal.
She just couldnât stop thinking about this afternoon and the things Derek had made her feel. God, how sheâd wanted him to cross this line, to kiss her, touch her. Hadnât he noticed how much sheâd been begging for his touch?! Of course he had, and heâd enjoyed it.
He had known that he had her, that he had just needed to brush her lips with his to make her forget about the fact that she even had a boyfriend.
Stop it! Stop thinking about him! Donât think about his luxurious body, or his hands⌠how they would feel on your skinâŚ
She knew she shouldnât think such things about another man, nor do what she was about to do while she was thinking about another man. But she couldnât help it.
If only he had kissed her, touched her, just once. He surely would know how she wanted to be touched without having to be told. She could very well imagine how his hands would feel on her skin, how he touched her, kissed herâŚ
Her phone started buzzing again, but she didnât even hear it. She was wrapped up in her own little world that at the moment was only revolving around a certain agent.
She didnât know that on the other end of the line, her long-term boyfriend was going crazy with jealousy â“ and he didnât know that right now, he had every reason to be.
Penelope had to bite her lips so hard they started to bleed, to keep herself from screaming Derekâs name. With her open window and his room right next to hers, he would surely have heard her.
What on earth had gotten into her?! Penelope couldnât believe she had just done that. For almost three years, she had managed to think about Kevin, and him only, in moments like this.
He doesnât want you. Not this way. This is never going to happen!
She knew this was crazy. She knew she shouldnât go back to thinking about him this way. But it felt so good. Much better than it felt when she thought about Kevin. Even if this was never going to happen in a billion years.
A girl could dream, though.
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ize678
11/20/23 09:43 am
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ize678
11/20/23 09:43 am
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ize678
11/20/23 09:40 am
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11/11/23 07:39 pm
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11/11/23 07:39 pm
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Pari
04/13/23 01:11 am
LilP7 you can find the link to create a series under the member account page, when you log in.
LilP7
12/10/22 07:18 am
Took the plunge and wrote a lil story. Thx to Pari and all other FF writers for inspiring me to put my idea on paper (well digitally at least)
LilP7
12/10/22 06:56 am
Took the plunge and wrote a lil story. Thx to Pari and all other FF writers for inspiring me to put my idea on paper (well digitally at least)
LilP7
11/29/22 11:54 am
As I mentioned b4, I am Garvez all the eay. Though I am definetly enjoying yr MorGar (or is that Morcia?) Ones too. Reading them again and leaving some reviews to show appreciation 4 yr hard work
Pari
11/29/22 08:31 am
@LilP7 Thank you for joining and I hope you enjoy the stories :)
11/20/23 09:43 am
Thanks for A number of other enlightening weblog. <a </a>
ize678
11/20/23 09:43 am
Thanks for A number of other enlightening weblog. <a </a>
ize678
11/20/23 09:40 am
web sot online Thanks for A number http://ize678.com/
Nam
11/11/23 07:39 pm
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Nam
11/11/23 07:39 pm
Only aspire to mention types written content is as extraordinary. This clarity together with your put up is excellent and that I could think youâre a guru for this problem. Substantial-excellent in
Pari
04/13/23 01:11 am
LilP7 you can find the link to create a series under the member account page, when you log in.
LilP7
12/10/22 07:18 am
Took the plunge and wrote a lil story. Thx to Pari and all other FF writers for inspiring me to put my idea on paper (well digitally at least)
LilP7
12/10/22 06:56 am
Took the plunge and wrote a lil story. Thx to Pari and all other FF writers for inspiring me to put my idea on paper (well digitally at least)
LilP7
11/29/22 11:54 am
As I mentioned b4, I am Garvez all the eay. Though I am definetly enjoying yr MorGar (or is that Morcia?) Ones too. Reading them again and leaving some reviews to show appreciation 4 yr hard work
Pari
11/29/22 08:31 am
@LilP7 Thank you for joining and I hope you enjoy the stories :)
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